juushika: Gif of a Bebe, a tiny doll from the anime Puella Magi Madoka Magica, eating a slice of cheesecake (Bebe)
Little free libraries are a great way to try a picture book I wouldn't pick up intentionally, because they come with a certain degree of recommendation (someone had this, once, and presumably read it) as well as the novelty of finding a random book on a walk. My picture book reading is generally the result of chasing a specific author or theme, and outside that I don't just browse them at my actual public library b/c I don't actually want to be in kids' spaces, so I enjoy the invitation to diversify. I also like care bearing by dropping the read books off at a different LFL than where I found them.

Some adventures from little free library picture book browsing:

that person who offloaded cat-themed picture books

for a while the LFL I pass weekly (on our weekend patisserie walk) was offloading Jewish picture books, which is very relevant to my interests

the nearest elementary school has a LFL in the parking lot, chockablock full; and conveniently they're close to a different pasty shop

...and the school built the library out of plywood that at the first rain swelled so bad the door got wedged closed :( RIP library, may they resurrect you


Title: Emma
Author: Barbara Cooney
Published: Dragonfly Books, 1993
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 30
Total Page Count: 507,020
Text Number: 1809
Read Because: borrowed from a local Little Free Library
Review: A lonely old lady finds a new purpose in her painting. Not to spoil a picture book, but: as soon as her paintings started to gain social attention, my hackles went up, expecting a "provide value to earn love" narrative; thankfully, this isn't that. At the end of the day, people leave, Emma is still alone—but alone with her fulfilling work and surrounded by the beauty she's created. That's the way to do it. A picture book about art inevitably suits itself, rich with paintings-within-paintings, vibrant and beautiful. (This is the author/illustrator behind Miss Rumphius and, while not as transcendent, has many of the same charms.)


Title: What-A-Mess
Author: Frank Muir
Published: General Pub. Co, 1997
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 30
Total Page Count: 507,050
Text Number: 1810
Read Because: borrowed from a local Little Free Library
Review: An afghan puppy who doesn't know he's a puppy tries on other round brown forms to explain why he's such a mess. Another picture book with a delightful reversal at the end: after his failed experiments, the puppy is given an answer ... and misinterprets it, coming away with more glorious experiments to try tomorrow. I like that the antics of self-discovery are about the journey, not the destination, and Muir's illustrations are—well, the puppy's face looks weird as hell, but the vibrancy and detail of the illustrations capture the chaotic energy of the premise.


Title: When the Storm Comes
Author: Linda Ashman
Illustrator: Taeeun Yoo
Published: Nancy Paulsen Books, 2020
Rating: 2 of 5
Page Count: 30
Total Page Count: 515,100
Text Number: 1865
Read Because: another Little Free Library find
Review: Very cozy, a little dark, and diversely community- and family-focused. All good things! But nothing that sticks with me as an adult reader of picture books, and the jewel-toned cool greens and deep blues could not be more repulsive to me aesthetically, which is a personal problem but still stops me from appreciating this.
juushika: Landscape from the movie What Dreams May Come, showing a fantastical purple tree on golden hills (What Dreams May Come)
Late winter gardening season, the big prune when it's cold enough that the prunees don't immediately take as invitation to grow in response to the cut, or: I've been burning through audiobooks, again.

The weather has been uncooperative, lots of rain, pushing my timeline later and later. I've also been more aggressive in my pruning; almost everything got long and droopy last year so, none of that: cut deeper and with more abandon and trust future growth to extend from there. I'm learning, as I inhabit a garden for multiple years. There's a growing confidence but also a lot of grace, because I'm learning that the plants on our property were planted for a reason, mostly that common garden plants are hardy and enthusiastic growers. So many pruning guides will have a "here's your ideal perfect growth pattern" and then "and, yes, you can just wack this down to the ground if you gotta." So the rain hasn't stressed me. I wish I'd gotten more done pre-March, but also know there is space for imperfection.

A trend in GR review for The Ruin of All Witches is "it's fine but such a slog" but, see, the secret is that when a book reads itself to you, there is nearly none such thing. On the other hand, it is now forever one of many grapevine books.


Title: The Kiss
Author: Kathryn Harrison
Published: Random House, 2011 (1996)
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 255
Total Page Count: 503,315
Text Number: 1791
Read Because: personal enjoyment, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: The author's memoir of her romantic and sexual relationship with her estranged father, and its effect on her troubled relationship with her mother. This is, I take it, one of the earlier well-read incest memoirs, and highly divisive at the time of release. It doesn't feel as surprising, now: rather than shocking or grotesque, Harrison is restrained to the point of sterility, scope parred down, sentences overwritten, everything narrativized to within an inch of its life. I can't say if that makes it less honest, and it remains engaging and thoughtful, but it's a very self-conscious approach to honesty that kept me at a distance.


Title: Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism
Author: Amanda Montell
Narrator: Ann Marie Gideon
Published: HarperAudio, 2021
Rating: 3.5 of 5
Page Count: 315
Total Page Count: 505,880
Text Number: 1802
Read Because: IIRC this came up in a review of Dickey's Under the Eye of Power, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: A bloated but promising text, weighed down by an excess of signposting, a chatty style, and repetitive restatements of the thesis which all amount of "so, the unifying feature is language, thus the title and subject of this book"; a thesis frequently undermined by recurring non-linguistic social elements. Still, Montell looks at a diversity of cults and cult-like spaces, not quite satisfying in breadth or depth but still productive when compared, and the thesis holds water. The more technical discussions of concepts like thought-terminating clichés, gaslighting, and lovebombing are what stick with me. As pop-sci cult studies/linguistics go, this is definitely that: approachable to its own detriment, but I buy it.


Title: The Ruin of All Witches: Life and Death in the New World
Author: Malcolm Gaskill
Narrator: Kristin Atherton
Published: Random House Audio, 2002
Rating: 4.5 of 5
Page Count: 335
Total Page Count: 506,890
Text Number: 1805
Read Because: personal enjoyment, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Nonfiction, a history of the witchcraft trials of Hugh and Mary Parsons in Springfield, 1651, forty years before the Salem Witch Trials. Gaskill does something I love, which is to report the events as the townspeople themselves experienced and reported on them, ex. when someone says they saw/experienced an uncanny event, Gaskill simply reports it from their PoV, not interpreting or doubting the account. Simultaneously, Gaskill provides the historical context of social tensions and contemporary religious conflicts, and the broader context of witch trials across Europe and America, although a date-blind reader like me could have benefited from an explicit timeline. Nonetheless, the commentary writes itself: these events were real to those who experienced them; they were, also, the product of their social and cultural milieu. It's a demystifying and compassionate approach that digs deep into one local case, offering takeaways that can be applied to the history of witch trials in the United States, particularly the events in Salem. Very solid!
juushika: Photograph of a black cat named November, as a kitten, sitting in an alcove on top of a pile of folded scarves (November)
The other thing I did in 2022 (other than read game manuals, and consume good media, and also we bought a house) is that I followed through on the "as soon as I have a house, I'm getting a third cat" threat & got a kitten.

The lead-up & adoption. )

The first few weeks. )

Meanwhile, I named the kitten November, called Vivi.

Here's Vivi's backstory )

So. I wanted a kitten to make the house feel alive, and certainly she did that! In a horrible, frenetic way, at first! I also wanted to be happier, and after those initial weeks, guess what: Vivi is perfect.

Despite the odds, she's just as her bio claimed. She gets along great with the other cats, and has impeccable cat manners despite occasional little-sibling behavior (is this annoying? is this annoying? when I poke your face, is that annoying?). August tolerates her with enthusiasm—August's special way of cohabitating, "I would be lonely without you, but please don't touch me". Toby is absolutely enriched by her—they're not best-friend snuggle-buddies, but they'll co-sleep and play and he bullies her just a little, but not too much.

But her truest joy is people. August is a die-hard lap cat, Toby apparently literally stops eating without cuddles, but Vivi is a monster for companionship. For a long time she only wanted to be held (head over the left shoulder) and would throw a hissyfit if put down; she now has expanded her repertoire to include laps (!) and various forms of co-sleeping. Every morning she wakes me by lying on my shoulder/neck for cuddles. She purrs for hours, hours; nothing about Vivi is an exaggeration: the sweetest, most loving cat I've ever met.

I don't like kittens because they look dumb & because even year-old cats are too much energy for me. But Vivi is a miracle. Her play is enthusiastic but ridiculously low-effort, much of it self-directed. She never went through asshole phases.

Also, she's about 8 months now and still so tiny. 6.5-7 pounds? She makes kittenish meep-meep sounds instead of meowing (she can meow! it's tiny, too. she only does it while playing) and a lot of her other vocalizations are small, like soundless chattering. It's possible her voice could change, and she'll certainly continue to fill out into an adult. But she's my only kitten and feels very much like a perma-kitten; a kitten with all the good and none of the bad parts of a kitten: tiny, very silly, curious and joyful, unbearably sweet, so cute it physically hurts my body.

Devon loves her—the other cats are mine but Vivi feels more like ours, like she wouldn't chose favorites between us (except she would) (it would be me: I feed her).

I've lived in a four-cat household before, I've been effective-caretaker for three cats at once, but something about this combination—three cats, an aesthetically pleasing odd number, all black DMH which I find so, so beautiful; all so different despite this similarity, complete individuals, completely unique ... I'm over the moon; I love her and I love them and the house, which I also love, feels complete in a soul-satisfying way. Three is the perfect number.

Vivi wasn't a secret kitten on purpose. I just haven't wanted to talk to people—the move was a lot of work, aesthetic changes to the house consume a lot of my time ... but mostly it's that, after my sister died, I just didn't want to reach out to anyone. Vivi can't fix that; it's a huge burden for very small shoulders. Nonetheless she is a miracle. The mythologization of cat adoption stories truly happens after the fact: despite that it was a truly horribly time, she was the right cat. She's only been here five months, and already I couldn't imagine life without her.

Anyway, who cares! Kitten pictures, in approximately-chronological order. There would be more, but it turns out I'm in most of my Vivi pictures, as she prefers to be On Person at All Times. Images are labeled for my records, as temporary hosting will doubtless nuke them.



(november 001)


(november 002)

Those were the pics on her adoption listing!

11 pics below the cut. )
juushika: Gif of a Bebe, a tiny doll from the anime Puella Magi Madoka Magica, eating a slice of cheesecake (Bebe)
Two throwbacks to painting the main room, seven calendar years ago; the last is from painting the breakfast nook Carrot Stick by Benjamin Moore and, y'all, I cannot tell you how much joy is in this color! Was it a pain to do, yes, although an appropriately-tinted primer helped a lot. But I wanted an orange, no, like a bright orange breakfast nook, and this looks so good with the white trim and warm floors and touches of black (that last helps me plan furniture for the space). What I don't know is what to do in the kitchen, but I have another project lined up first so there's time to decide.

These first two are very good.


Title: Couple Found Slain: After a Family Murder
Author: Mikita Brottman
Narrator: Christina Delaine
Published: Macmillan Audio, 2021
Rating: 5 of 5
Page Count: 255
Total Page Count: 405,050
Text Number: 1524
Read Because: more true crime on audio while painting, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: In 1992, at age 22, Brian Bechtold experienced a psychotic break and murdered his abusive parents. Ruled "not criminally responsible," he was committed to Clifton T. Perkins Hospital Center—indefinitely: as of writing, he still has not been released. This capitalizes on the interest in true crime in order to explore the aftermath: a long life after crime, what it means to be institutionalized at the state's discretion, and particularly the flaws that exist in these mental health systems and their (lack of) oversight. This is the most rage-inducing, triggering, and pointedly unsatisfying book I've ever read, because there still is no resolution for Bechtold. I'm terrified of institutionalization, and honestly for good reason! because the system is unregulated and broken: a patient can suffer mental illness, require treatment, and not be given it; psychiatrists will pathologize any behavior to fit preexisting diagnoses; and once in the system, patients have no recourse. So if Brottman's biography feels a bit biased, it's nonetheless a productive counterpoint to the dominant narrative. I hated reading this, but I'm grateful for it.


Title: Midnight in Chernobyl: The Untold Story of the World's Greatest Nuclear Disaster
Author: Adam Higginbotham
Narrator: Jacques Roy
Published: Simon & Schuster Audio, 2019
Rating: 5 of 5
Page Count: 550
Total Page Count: 405,600
Text Number: 1525
Read Because: "I should take a break from true crime," I thought, "and check out some scientific non-fiction instead," and then stumbled into something somehow even more morbid than usual! (this is not a complaint); audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: An exhaustive but thoroughly readable overview of the Chernobyl disaster—which means that this is as much about the Soviet Union as it is about nuclear reactors: how to run a society such that a catastrophic event is, effectively, inevitable. I don't have a deep take, here; this is just everything I could have asked for: comprehensive, humanized, offering a lot of valuable Ukrainian history, and somehow able to make me even more afraid of acute radiation syndrome than I already was (which was a lot!).


Title: The Devil's Gentleman: Privilege, Poison, and the Trial That Ushered in the Twentieth Century
Author: Harold Schechter
Narrator: Sean Runnette
Published: Tantor Audio, 2017 (2007)
Rating: 2 of 5
Page Count: 505
Total Page Count: 406,215
Text Number: 1527
Read Because: more true crime while paining, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Turn of the century America; Roland Molineux is suspected of sending poisoned gifts two of his rivals. Schechter assumes Molineux's guilt, and the circumstantial case is strong; so this is an interesting court case that didn't end of a conviction, that says a lot about the judicial process of the period.

But boy howdy is this a, shall we say, "stylized" read. Schechter will criticize his sources as prejudiced, salacious, or sentimental, and then gleefully reiterate the same content and tone—a trend so consistent it's almost charming. In the historical context as the (first) "crime of the century," this is a pulpy, even stereotypical read: big turn-of-the-century vibes, all chauvinism and sexism and homophobia, yellow journalism and the poisoning craze. Fun, but not good, although the flaws are more in style than content.
juushika: Photograph of a black cat named August, laying down, looking to the side, framed by sunlight (August)
As You Wish I listened to very slowly (for relative "chewing through audiobooks at a prodigious rate" definitions) so that I could savor it; my strongest associations now are listening while gardening, which is a pretty great association. I ... like gardening? This is remarkable because I've always hated it, because I'm terrified of spiders & insects and also afraid of the sun, and don't like being hot. But as it turns out, when you have complete autonomy you can opt in to things and set yourself up for the best chances of success. And with long pants and long sleeves and gloves, at dawn or dusk, I can decide "I am going into spider land (there are so many spiders), and that's okay, this is their territory and I'll probably be too busy to get freaked out" ... and it works, and I love the tangible, satisyfing results gardening, especially since most of it is cutting back bushes/vines, and, like the painting, I feel such a sense of ownership of this land, this house, its state and appearance.

The others are from starting to paint Devon's bedroom Silverplate on most walls, which is recently finished! The last step is painting the window accent wall Anchors Aweigh.


Title: As You Wish: Inconceivable Tales from the Making of The Princess Bride
Author: Cary Elwes, Joe Layden
Narrators: Cary Elwes, Christopher Guest, Carol Kane, Norman Lear, Rob Reiner, Wallace Shawn, Robin Wright, Billy Crystal
Published: Simon Schuster Audio, 2014
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 265
Total Page Count: 398,730
Text Number: 1506
Read Because: reviewed by [personal profile] rachelmanija, and I was just waiting to read it until I needed it most; audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: I like The Princess Bride a normal amount: read & watched it to death, sure, but also watched every special feature and read every anecdote; not much here was new to me. But the real pleasure is a first-person account, from Elwes but also from guest contributors, most of them read by the authors. It's cozy, it's loving; it has a wit, sardonic humor, and earnestness that is everything I adore in the film. The transition to audio isn't perfect—the (what I assume were) inset blurbs sit awkwardly within Elwes's narration. But that's just a nitpick in a lovely read. I treasured my time with this; good feels all around.


Title: The Disordered Mind: What Unusual Brains Tell Us about Ourselves
Author: Eric R. Kandel
Narrator: David Stifel
Published: Macmillan Audio, 2018
Rating: 1 of 5
Page Count: 80 of 305
Total Page Count: 400,955
Text Number: 1513
Read Because: more nonfiction while painting, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: DNF at 25%. If I could overlook the language, this could probably educate me about the relationship between the physiological and psychological elements of the brain. Unfortunately, the language is so bad that I'll never find out! It opens with a chapter on autism that's as awful as you might imagine (framed as a disorder, feat. an autism mom interview), and I have no reason to expect better from the rest.


Title: What If? Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions (What If? Book #1)
Author: Randall Munroe
Narrator: Wil Wheaton
Published: Blackstone Audio, 2014
Rating: 3.5 of 5
Page Count: 320
Total Page Count: 402,400
Text Number: 1517
Read Because: fan of the author, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: A charming potato chip read. Did I retain anything? Doubtful! But the approach to the questions, the wild escalations viewed through hard science, is conceptually informative, and very XKCD, and so plainly joyous. Wheaton is a fun pick as a reader.
juushika: Photograph of a black cat named October, peering out of a white fleece cave (October)
The first a leftover from painting my bedroom, but it took an age to finish the review. The other two are from painting the landing, which we repainted almost an identical color to the original, but not quite, and it cleaned up some not-insignificant patches on the window-wall and the ceiling around the chimney. We wanted to make the landing light and airy, to offset the fact that it's reached from an enclosed stairway and has lower ceilings. And it looks great up here now! But it really needs an infusion of color. This is where my desk goes, so the trim is white, the walls are off-white, the AC & cat litter box are white, the desk & computer are black. Maybe a vibrant chair cover? A colorful lampshade? Art??? Rug?


Title: Consent: A Memoir (Le consentement)
Author: Vanessa Springora
Translator: Natasha Lehrer
Narrator: Anne-Marie Piazza
Published: HarperVia, 2021 (2020)
Rating: 5 of 5
Page Count: 210
Total Page Count: 399,085
Text Number: 1508
Read Because: reviewed by chthonic-cassandra, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: As a young teenager, the author was in a relationship with (read: was groomed and sexually exploited by) an acclaimed writer 40 years her senior (Gabriel Matzneff), a relationship condoned by her mother and by the larger artistic community of Paris. Beautifully written, on audio beautifully narrated. The author approaches her childhood experiences in present tense, through the point of view of her childhood self, but brings along an adult's knowledge of the social framework that made the abuse possible. It's clear-sighted, compassionate, graceful, and unforgiving—a slim and effective memoir.


Title: Last Call: A True Story of Love, Lust, and Murder in Queer New York
Author: Elon Green
Narrator: David Pittu
Published: Macmillan Audio, 2021
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 275
Total Page Count: 400,875
Text Number: 1512
Read Because: reading true crime while painting, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: In the '80s and '90s, a serial killer preyed on queer men in and around New York; these murders have since been almost entirely forgotten. In revisiting these events, Green takes any excuse to digress into queer history—the bar scene before and during the AIDS pandemic, the activist groups working in uneasy alliance with the police—and, let me be clear, that's fantastic. The emphasis lands squarely on the victims, their lives, and particularly their place in the larger queer community of this location and era. It's sorrowful and critical, highlighting the environment (read: policing) that allowed a murderer like this to operate and which buried the story; it's also loving, even joyful: a celebration of a vulnerable but diverse and vibrant subculture.

(Elon is such an unfortunate name to have in 2022; Mr. Green seems like a great guy and I apologize to him that every time I pulled up the book on Libby/his name came up in the accompanying interview I did experience a full-body cringe.)


Title: By Their Father's Hand: The True Story of the Wesson Family Massacre
Author: Monte Francis
Narrator: John Glouchevitch
Published: Tantor Audio, 2017
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 290
Total Page Count: 401,245
Text Number: 1514
Read Because: more true crime while painting, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: The case is engaging, but the writing's not. Quoting extensively from a recording made at the scene and from trial testimony, this isn't bare-bones and may even border sensational. But it barely extends beyond the case's evidence, and would benefit from a deeper look into Wesson and/or the mechanics and effects of brainwashing. It's a hell of case! I'm surprised I'd never heard of it, and this is a functional overview. But the book leaves a bizarre "so what?" aftertaste: a lot of facts, but no insight.
juushika: Photograph of a black cat named October, peering out of a white fleece cave (October)
More audiobooks while painting—all of these are from turning the living room/alcove Urbane Bronze, a rich deep almost-black-almost-brown and a huge job which is still not quite done because one wall requires patching that I've been procrastinating. But it looks really good! The dark walls are balanced by the scale of the room and light coved ceiling, and the color makes the white trim pop. Yes, someday I should take pictures, but nothing is ever finished.

Also all of these books are bad. One good takeaway: Turkle is a stellar surname & great fun to say.


Title: Blind Descent: The Quest to Discover the Deepest Place on Earth
Author: James M. Tabor
Narrator: Don Leslie
Published: Random House Audio, 2010
Rating: 1 of 5
Page Count: 300
Total Page Count: 395,950
Text Number: 1498
Read Because: mentioned in Jacob Geller's video Fear of Depths, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Caves are great! Caving is interesting! The hero-worship here decidedly is neither, and the tone (presaged by the early unironic use of "alpha male") irritates. DNF at 15%.


Title: The Crime of the Century: Richard Speck and the Murders That Shocked a Nation
Author: Dennis L. Breo, William J. Martin
Narrator: Christina Delaine
Published: Tantor Audio, 2021 (1993)
Rating: 1.5 of 5
Page Count: 540
Total Page Count: 396,490
Text Number: 1499
Read Because: reviewed by Katherine Addison, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Easily the worst true crime I've ever read. It's ridiculously biased: co-written by the prosecutor and so pro-police (and anti-insanity defense, and anti-defense in general, and gently dated particularly re: race, with a fun bit of transphobia in the appendices!) that it's difficult to trust even its exhaustive thoroughness and the solid case against Speck.


Title: Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other
Author: Sherry Turkle
Narrator: Laural Merlington
Published: Tantor Media, 2011
Rating: 1.5 of 5
Page Count: 375
Total Page Count: 397,870
Text Number: 1503
Read Because: a great quote from this (kids dissect/bury a "dead" furby) from this was floating around Tumblr; audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: An absolute hate-read. These are subjects I'm incredibly invested in, these are concerns I share, but Turkle is so alarmist, negative, and willing to cherrypick evidence that she comes off as a cross between Black Mirror and Old Man Yells at Cloud.
juushika: Gif of a Bebe, a tiny doll from the anime Puella Magi Madoka Magica, eating a slice of cheesecake (Bebe)
The last audiobook from Wilsonville, bizarre now to think that I would listen to them while doing such prosaic things as gaming; and the first of books listened to while painting. So many audiobooks while painting, and many (books, walls) still to come. These were from painting my bedroom Queen Anne Lilac and Turkish Coffee.


Title: Don't Call It a Cult: The Shocking Story of Keith Raniere and the Women of NXIVM
Author: Sarah Berman
Narrator: Ewa Wolniczek
Published: Steerforth Press, 2021
Rating: 4.5 of 5
Page Count: 320
Total Page Count: 393,920
Text Number: 1489
Read Because: more true crime on audio while gaming, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: This isn't the first book I've read about cults, but it certainly gave me the most complete picture of them, particularly the overlap between cult and MLM—who and how they recruit; the relationship between pseudoscience and social manipulation; how they operate, how they escalate. The sheer scale of this case, both in timescale and number of players, got a little away from me, but that's not uncommon on audio. But on the whole a great reading experience: thorough and thoughtful but rooted in compassion; comprehensive, with a fascinating subject matter.


Title: The Good Girls: An Ordinary Killing
Author and narrator: Sonia Faleiro
Published: Random House Audio
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 335
Total Page Count: 394,810
Text Number: 1493
Read Because: listening to true crime while painting walls, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: After the bodies of two girls were found hanging from a mango tree in rural India, their family insisted they remain there until political attention had been brought to their deaths. I appreciate how exhaustive this is; I didn't know much about the politics of rural India going in, and context is everything in understanding why these girls died and how the investigation into their deaths was conducted. An insightful, wide-reaching, heartbreaking, and productive book.


Title: Amy: My Search for Her Killer: Secrets and Suspects in the Unsolved Murder of Amy Mihaljevic
Author and narrator: James Renner
Published: Tantor Audio, 2018 (2006)
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 250
Total Page Count: 395,060
Text Number: 1494
Read Because: reviewed by Katherine Addison/listening to true crime while painting walls, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: A journalist investigates a cold case from his childhood and turns up no answers—an inauspicious but deceptively interesting premise, albeit not necessarily for good reasons. Renner discloses his personal investment and openly explores the thin line between investigative reporting and obsession while still keeping Amy's story centered. But an investigator's investigation/obsession does not touch them alone, and the way that Renner approaches interviews is frankly unpleasant to read: he reopens the case for those who knew Amy, he badgers previous suspects, in a way that frequently feels insensitive and retraumatizing. Does the pursuit of answers justify this? I'm not sure! (And would this seem like an easier question to answer if Renner had found the perpetrator?) Renner cherrypicks feedback rather than asking himself this question. An insightful look into the work of investigation, but it leaves a bad taste.

Moving!

Jul. 9th, 2022 01:08 pm
juushika: Photograph of a black cat named October, peering out of a white fleece cave (October)
I promise that everything only looks like a last-minute decision; I'm just never sure if things will actually come together until ... the very last minute.

The cats and I are moving up to the house! It was driving me crazy to work on it only a few hours each weekend (and it meant that our progress was, unsurprisingly, slow). Moving up with just the bare necessities (me-bed, cat-beds, something to sit on) means that I can tackle cleaning, painting, floor polishing, etc. while the house is still largely empty. Devon will handle moving the furniture in a few weeks, and will join me by the end of the month.

I will have internet, but minimally (via a phone plan). I pre-loaded, oh, a million books and podcasts and Netflix shows. I've always liked brief periods of inconvenience, like the days before the internet gets put in or a snow storm knocking out power. I'm a little less excited about not having AC, in summer, while living alone, while doing new-to-me house things, but! I believe in myself, and the truth is that anything I can get done will be a faster timeline than we have been getting things done, so the bar is low.

I did so much pre-packing of media/linens/etc,, but the last 48 hours before moving people and animals turns out to be ridiculously busy despite that; amazing how many objects feel like invisible parts of daily life but are, in fact, physical goods that need to be transported.

Because of my limited internet access, I expect I'll be more absent than usual in the the coming weeks. See y'all on the flip side, I suppose!
juushika: Screen capture of the Farplane from Final Fantasy X: a surreal landscape of waterfalls and flowers. (Anime/Game)
We bought a house!

From the outside this probably looks like "getting finances ready to buy a house" moved directly to "we have a house now," but that's just only because I didn't have the heart to journal during the process, to become more invested in the houses we didn't get and cement the failures in my memory. In reality we did all the initial setup (finances, realtor) last September/October and started seriously hunting in November 2021, so it was a ~7 month search. We made offers on, I think?, 4.5 houses; successfully have I made the failures blended and vague in my memory.

2022 is a bonkers time to buy a house. The houses in our range have been selling at 10%+ over list price, which for the record is batshit super crazy—normal markup is something like 1% to 3%. (And no, appraisals aren't increasing to meet this.) Our realtor—and realtors really do have a shit job, don't they? so much front-facing work at honestly not enough income—our realtor says her work is always busy but that it's worse now: buyers usually make an offer and then ... get a house; now they have to make as many as ten offers, which means ten times the paperwork.

But as incredibly awful and stressful as this process has been, our multiple failed offers helped us refine our search, set our expectations, and wait for a good deal. In retrospect, I'm glad it worked out this way! At the time I was totally miserable, though; this is one of the worst things I've ever voluntarily done.

We made a dry run on the 0.5 house, getting as far as pulling together paperwork before Devon had second thoughts and pulled out—the right call for that property, a good practice run for figuring out not just what looked nice but what we actually wanted, although we were in no danger of getting it because it sold at 5% over what we would have offered. All of our actual offers were near-misses because we could offer a lot down but weren't willing to go stupidly high or to forgo inspections, which is another stupid thing that buyers are doing in the current market. All those house were great, it was awful to miss out, but seeing the prices/conditions they sold for leaves us with no regrets.

And then a month ago interest rates went up and everyone got cold feet—us, too! But this also meant that the sellers who were taking advantage of the market with higher-priced houses were suddenly finding that those houses didn't move. After another failed offer on a lower-priced house (which also sold at 5% over our offer), our realtor pointed us at one that had been on the market, which she'd toured and liked, which had recently had a 10k price drop. Devon talked with our money guy again and determined that the interest rate change honestly didn't affect our purchase power that much. Moreover we were able to offer at asking price, with an inspection, and we got it immediately.

So the takeaway seems to be: insofar as possible, just don't with the current market. Wait if you can. If you can't, be aggressive but not stupid: don't let prices escalate, don't take risks, just wait for sellers to grow overconfident. And probably luck helps, too.

I won't share public pictures until I can take them myself, just for privacy reasons. The house is in Olympia, Washington, one mile from downtown, in a beautiful old neighborhood. It's 1400 square feet, with potential to finish the basement. It was built in the 1930s, the compromise one makes to be close to town. But it's in great repair (our inspector loved it, although the unattached garage needs some work). Coved ceilings, arched details, built-ins, wood and tile floors, fireplace has been removed, kitchen remodel, sewer and electrical redone. Three beds and one bath, which is probably another reason it wasn't selling but works great for us. Near two schools, also a downside. But set back from the road and so, so charming.

We should close any day now! Our apartment lease lasts until the end of July, so we'll use the overlapping time to make trips up to photograph, finalize decorating plans, and do any pre-move in work we can. It's stressful to think of furnishing a place, our first actually-ours place, a hopefully-forever-home place, right after the incredible sticker shock of buying a whole dang house. But also we have the freedom to live there, we have time, time yet for a hundred indecisions, and for a hundred visions and revisions. I'm looking forward to it.

Also and most importantly, owning my own home means! three cats!!

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juushika

June 2025

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