juushika

Title: The Starving Saints
Author: Caitlin Starling
Published: Harper Voyager, May 20, 2025
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 350
Total Page Count: 528,960
Text Number: 1937
Read Because: fan if the author, ebook ARC from NetGalley
Review: A castle under siege is saved from starvation by dangerous figures in the form of the Lady and her Saints. This is one of the weirder books I've read in recent memory, and I love weird, but I'm not sure that this weird works. The world is stylized, and the developing plot and magic system lean in hard: medieval vibes, a knight and bee-keeping nuns and an apostate madwoman; monsters masquerading as divine and fey bargains. The cast is very Starling, prickly women negotiating codependent murder/love desires, featuring sexy choking and revenge-lust, what's not to like.

But, structurally... Weird, I say again, but here that means: a hot mess. The narration rotates between the three characters, and they rarely come together or stay long in one place. It's a lot of traveling from one end of the grounds to the other, passing connections and deferred confrontations, and the result is something more gestural than inhabited. I think I appreciate the attempt; I prefer a strange read to an easy one, and this strange is viscous and hungry. But it's also a borderline slog.

Title: Our Share of the Night (Nuestra parte de noche)
Author: Mariana Enríquez
Translator: Megan McDowell
Published: Hogarth, 2023 (2019)
Rating: 5 of 5
Page Count: 645
Total Page Count: 523,135
Text Number: 1902
Read Because: reviewed by chthonic_cassandra, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: A father fights to free his son from the grip of a powerful cult and dark figure that they summon. This is long, and long always makes me worry about bloat; but there isn't much here that I'd trim back. A family saga, it unfolds in pieces, in perspectives, unlocking like a puzzlebox new information about the family, the substantial worldbuilding, and the cultural context. The focus on the perpetuation of power is ruthless, with more triggers than I could list here, but it's character-focused, not preachy, and the speculative premise gives momentum to what might otherwise be a depressing slog. I loved this: devastating, tender, captivating; one of my best reads of the year.

Trying to get back in the habit of posting individual reviews so that my tags can actually mean something!


Title: Don't Let the Forest In
Author: C.G. Drews
Narrator: Michael Crouch
Published: Recorded Books, 2024
Rating: 2.5 of 5
Page Count: 335
Total Page Count: 521,435
Text Number: 1897
Read Because: more horror available now on audio, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Best friends at boarding school are hounded by monsters born of their art. This unforgivably overwritten, with one extra adjective in every sentence and dialog that apes that narrative voice, everything tortured metaphors about forest thorns and unrequited love and the monstrous self. I desperately want it to be scaled back: that language; the talky identity issues, which overflow with convenient GSA meetings and coming-outs where our protagonist explains he's this type of ace but all ace people are different and valid!!, the twist and ( spoiler ) resolution.

Because there's a kernel of something here which I adore. It's at the heart of that tortured artist forest prince nonsense and it's in the way that asexual desire scales back the importance of sex to focus instead on other forms of ardent expression: violence, entwinement, codependent need. It doesn't have to be less cringe to be good reading—the cringe, the raw idealization and projection, is a strength—but it has to be better written. I find this a lot when I dip my toe into YA: the clumsy balance of captivating dynamic to poor writing breaks my heart. This makes me want to reread The Wicker King, which is incredibly similar in premise & dynamic but which I remember fondly.

Another horror trio, give or take whatever would be the label for whatever Necrophilia Variations is attempting to do.


Title: Nestlings
Author: Nat Cassidy
Published: Tor, 2023
Rating: N/A
Page Count: 75 of 295
Total Page Count: 515,000
Text Number: 1863
Read Because: reviewed by rachelmanija, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: DNF at 25%. Probably there is something here, because even though I don't like the conversational, punchy voice, it had enough momentum to keep me reading. But then I realized that stories about childcare give me ickybad feels even when they're not about postpartum depression. Being trapped, socially and situationally and etc-ally is very much at the heart of this book, but my hangups doubled down on that and tore away any of the fun or atmospheric or provoking elements this probably is meant to have.


Title: Necrophilia Variations
Author: Supervert
Published: 2005
Rating: 1.5 of 5
Page Count: 200
Total Page Count: 515,400
Text Number: 1869
Read Because: unusually intimate relationships reasons obviously
Review: As more or less the ideal audience for this, I appreciate the audacity and the literal approach to "variations," a density of short and micro fiction riffing on the theme of necrophilia and beauty in death. Unfortunately, it's also ... bad. While not without standout moments, the best of the writing is marred by repetition, there's a pervasive and unproductive misogyny, and necrophilia is constantly compared to queerness and sex work as if these are deviations on a sliding scale of perversity, as if they speak to the same cultural anxieties, which ... they don't, and the insistence otherwise is limiting in every possible direction. 80% boring shock value, 20% "I might like this if someone else wrote it."


Title: Last to Leave the Room
Author: Caitlin Starling
Published: St. Martin's Griffin, 2024 (2023)
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 315
Total Page Count: 519,810
Text Number: 1893
Read Because: fan of the author, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Our protagonist is the cutthroat head of development behind an ansible-like technology. Only the technology may have knock-on effects, like the city sinking; like the basement in her home growing; like the door that appears there, and what comes through. Starling's oeuvre is composed of high-concept speculative hooks with pulpy but effective horror tensions set against issues of identity & queer longing, and I'm an easy sell on that combination even if the books don't always succeed. This one is very close to great, but missteps in similar ways to The Luminous Dead: there are concrete explanations which, while generally a good thing in speculative fiction, here are less interesting than any of the questions raised. This is particularly disappointing after The Death of Jane Lawrence, which does the opposite, growing stranger and more transformative as the speculative elements progress.

So: A slow open, establishing the protagonist's pre-speculative life, and she's unpleasant to hang out with. A great middle, with a glory of momentum and some creepy horror moments and interpersonal dynamics and particular expressions thereof (identity issues abounding, personal and bodily boundaries violated via body horror, relationships as dependency and infantilization and homemaking) that could have been written just for me. And then an ending which is too quickly paced and wraps up too neatly, both thematically and speculatively. I liked this a lot, I'll doubtless reread it, but was primed to love it and didn't quite get there.

Title: Squad
Author: Maggie Tokuda-Hall
Illustrator: Lisa Sterle
Published: Greenwillow Books, 2021
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 215
Total Page Count: 512,635
Text Number: 1852
Read Because: reviewed by starshipfox, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: On one hand, exactly what I would expect from "Mean Girls but sapphic werewolves"; on the other: it's Mean Girls, but sapphic werewolves, and I'm here for that. In striking a tonal balance, horror-but-fun, and cleaving to a single-volume length, this of course raises issues it never resolves, and those are so much less palatable and more interesting than the werewolves = hunger = anger = teen girl experience metaphor we get, which is resonant but broad; I wish fewer pages were stolen by the sweet but simple resolution. But taken within its limitations, this is delightful. Solid art, even if I don't love the wolves, fun reading experience, well constrained.


Title: Skin Deep
Author: Flo Woolley
Published: Silver Sprocket, 2024
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 30
Total Page Count: 512,665
Text Number: 1853
Read Because: browsing Hoopla for horror + standalone, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Reminiscent of Carroll in pacing and tone, with a moody blue and green color palette and a sinuous style, exploring the want to be with/want to be like of queer desire and the performance of beauty. Lovely! Also turned me on to Silver Sprocket, which publishes a number of short graphic novels with similar queer + (body) horror vibes.


Title: Prokaryote Season
Author: Leo Fox
Published: Silver Sprocket, 2023
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 165
Total Page Count: 513,760
Text Number: 1858
Read Because: reading the publisher, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library c/o Hoopla
Review: Obsessed and brimming with resentment, Sydney wishes for their best friend to need them - a wish that comes true in the worst way when that friend develops the fatal forest sickness. This kind of slightly whimsical, painfully earnest millennial angst ("I'm terrible queer representation") is cringe pressed and bound, and normally makes me recoil; and this did make me recoil, and yet... Too neat a resolution, as required in every narrative about learning self-love, but the specificity of its relatable anxieties, the dark whimsy with touches of abjection, and particularly the ugly honesty of insecurity in the shape of desire, possess craft and movement that works with these themes usually lack. I'm not fond of the art style and the font used for Trip's dialog is actively hostile, but the dense panels have that same sort of movement. This is a productive, energetic, naked wallowing; I don't know if I really like it so much as I'm impressed I didn't actively hate it, but with this kind of confrontational, too-real content ... that's kind of the same thing?

Title: Wishtree
Author: Katherine Applegate
Narrator: Nancy Linari
Published: Listening Library, 2017
Rating: 1.5 of 5
Page Count: 220
Total Page Count: 511,235
Text Number: 1846
Read Because: fan of the author & more children's lit on audio, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: A talking red oak tells the story of events unfolding in the local neighborhood. I appreciate the interjection of Nature Facts, and Applegate's heavy-handed messaging can totally work for me, see: Willodeen. But it doesn't here. Which strains credulity more, the talking wildlife who mostly talk about humans, or the local police who care a whole lot about hate crimes? This is twee, with earnest messaging that overrides common sense.


Title: Apostles of Mercy (Noumena Book 3)
Author: Lindsay Ellis
Published: St. Martin's Press, 2024
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 465
Total Page Count: 511,790
Text Number: 1847
Read Because: reading the series, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Cora and Ampersand perpetually procrastinate their departure as Cora falls in with Paris and physeterines are discovered on Earth. This isn't the book I wanted it to be, and much of my reading experience was adjusting my expectations and trying to figure out if the book it actually is is any good.

Because this is more of a lateral move than a progression, recycling the Kaveh relationship in Paris (and the supporting characters continue to feel indistinct, like Paris, or distinct-but-distinctly-awful, like Sol), continuing to distance the narrative from Cora's PoV (my perpetual regret) and Cora and Ampersand's relationship (via a contrived conflict rooted more in miscommunication than bad communication, which sucks), and lingering to explore the world-as-is. Leaving Earth to burn would be thematically nihilistic, so I admire, on that level, what it means to linger; and the narrative hook for book 4 promises that that lingering could still be alien and weird and ethically questionable. But the hook for this book was left dangling, which makes me distrustful; and, on a creative level, leaving could have been so bold & weird & insular & codependent &c, and that's what I want - that's what sold the first book, and that's what I'm waiting for in the sequels.

In the end, I did like this. But I like it because Ellis is tackling themes and tropes I'm obsessed on an interpersonal level I adore. There's still so much that compels me and makes me want more: sign me up for Nikola-Paris-Cora-Ampersand-Nikola, which forms a phyle that violates no mores but the little issue of bestiality, and for the long-awaited alien sexytimes. Hell, I even like the physeterine worldbuilding; Ellis's aliens are convincingly, compellingly alien. But the series is stagnating, deviating, and I'm having to search harder for the bits I want to latch on to.


Title: Freeze Tag
Author: Caroline B. Cooney
Published: Scholastic, 1992
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 175
Total Page Count: 511,965
Text Number: 1848
Read Because: reviewed by rachelmanija, borrowed from Open Library
Review: As a teen, blissfully happy in first love, our protagonist is confronted by the consequences of a strange event from her childhood. Teenage love, blackmail, the world's weirdest superpower and a winter setting that fits it perfectly, and Cooney's remarkable, metaphor-laden, taut voice - the last of which elevates this far beyond ... what, its deserving? the YA thriller genre? maybe just my expectations. This is worth it for the childhood prologue alone, which is phenomenal; the teenage parts grow melodramatic, but I like that this finds so much tension in the lingering, haunting imprint of that one childhood evening. Of course an outsider wouldn't believe: our protagonist can barely believe - it's too strange, too unsettling, for her to view directly, and that strengthens the horror elements in a book that sometimes errs towards thriller territory. The thematic development has some YA heavy-handedness, but the uneasy ending is equally successful, especially compared to, again, my expectations of its particular trope.

Somehow, I never encountered Cooney as a kid, but she was ridiculously prolific, particularly in this genre. I'll have to look into more of her work.

Title: Mystery of the Witches' Bridge aka The Witch's Bridge
Author: Barbee Oliver Carleton
Published: Scholastic, 1967
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 305
Total Page Count: 498,360
Text Number: 1775
Read Because: reviewed by rachelmanija, borrowed from Open Library
Review: An orphaned boy is taken in by his closest living relative, his reclusive uncle, who carries the burden of a local feud that began with a witch trial. This is a fascinating little book. The actual plot is an adequate if unremarkable classic MG adventure story: family secrets, local feuds, a hammy antagonist, and a wealth of tortured miscommunication made bearable by a quiet internal focus which centers the protagonist's frustrated need for friendship and family.

But, line by line, the writing is phenomenal. The setting is ridiculously evocative -

With each step the island, solid and safe, fell behind. The salt marsh gradually became the whole world, half land, half sea, wide and bright and windswept, and threatening.

- and that tone often touches the character work, especially in the darker, moodier sections:

Dan's mind rocked. His uncle believed! In spite of what he had said about superstition, his uncle believed in the witch's curse! The floor beneath Dan's feet became suddenly like the marsh, unsure, tremulous.

It's a pleasure to read, and elevates an otherwise-okay book to something special. The bulk of the reviews of this are from readers who imprinted on this as children, and I can see why it left that mark.


Title: The Ten Thousand Doors of January
Author: Alix E. Harrow
Published: Redhook, 2019
Rating: 2 of 5
Page Count: 385
Total Page Count: 498,755
Text Number: 1776
Read Because: reviewed by mrissa, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: The ward of a wealthy collector opens an improbable doorway and begins a journey of discovery into her own past and into portal worlds. I found this mildly annoying and justifying that feels like nitpicking, and probably is, because my prior exposure to Harrow was "A Witch's Guide to Escape: A Practical Compendium of Portal Fantasies," which I kind of hated, so I was predisposed to be a grump. But there's legitimate things to be grumpy about!

Same-voice plagues the inset narratives. The writing and themes are twee, and I say this as someone who loves both books-within-books and meta portal fantasy: it's a lot of self-congratulatory rhapsodizing on the power of stories, doctored up with language that tries hard to be poetic but mostly lands on forced. The handling of race, privilege, and social change has a similar vibe: patently well-intended but very talky and not especially nuanced. The antagonist and romances combined overshadow the exploration of portals. It's not bad. It's fine. But I'm a sucker for what this is trying to do, I should have loved it, but mostly I see missed potential.


Title: Goddess of Filth
Author: V. Castro
Narrator: Stacy Gonzalez
Published: Tantor Audio, 2022 (2021)
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 155
Total Page Count: 498,910
Text Number: 1777
Read Because: personal enjoyment, audiobook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Inverting the usual possession narrative, a group of high school grads summon an indigenous female spirit who brings violent transformation to one of their number. The audio narration of this is bad, injecting an overacted quality that amplifies the clumsy elements of the writing. I would have liked this more in print. Irreverent, honest, on-the-nose but still doing interesting things particularly in the intersections of race/colonialism with pop feminism. It's not subtle, and the revenge fantasy elements and antagonist veer towards hot mess. But it's fun, and the dirtier moments of female sexual empowerment and the more restrained elements in the evolving dynamic between possessor/possessed are engaging.

Title: Vespertine
Author: Margaret Rogerson
Published: Margaret K. McElderry Books, 2021
Rating: 3.5 of 5
Page Count: 400
Total Page Count: 485,710
Text Number: 1720
Read Because: reviewed by tamaranth, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: 3.5 stars rounded up. When a novice nun takes possession of a revenant to protect her abbey from attack, she's forced to flee, to save her people, and to rethink with everything she thought she knew about relationships between the sighted and the spirits they cleanse and possess. This is in every word, and I mean every plot reveal, every character arc, supremely predictable - but in a kind of "Holy Shit! Two Cakes!" way: want some grumpy soulbonding and an outsider character carving her little niche in the world? good news, this is heaps of that, with a gloomy/spooky aesthetic for good measure.

I wish it weren't so easy. There's a scene where the protagonist is explicitly told "you (a perceived saint) are not obligated to help us (save the entire city)" which is indicative of the tonal issues: at least on a social level, the wish-fulfillment is so complete as to be unrelatable, almost alienating despite the obvious good intentions. But I still liked this, in no small part because I am the holy-shit-two-cakes audience: I love this trope and won't turn down another take on it.


Title: The Animals at Lockwood Manor
Author: Jane Healey
Published: Mariner Books, 2021 (2020)
Rating: 2 of 5
Page Count: 345
Total Page Count: 486,585
Text Number: 1722
Read Because: this appears on most every queer gothic recommendations list; ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Accompanying a natural history museum evacuating part of its collection in anticipation of the Blitz, our protagonist moves to Lockwood manor and meets its tyrannical head and beautiful, fragile heir. It's an interesting combination of elements - decrepit manor filled with taxidermy and repressed lesbians and potential hauntings - but clumsily handled, a debut effort which is slow-moving in parts and has an over-explained, heavy-handed ending


Title: The House of the Seven Gables
Author: Nathaniel Hawthorne
Published: 1981
Rating: 2 of 5
Page Count: 110 of 220
Total Page Count: 486,695
Text Number: 1723
Read Because: mentioned in Colin Dickey's Ghostland: An American History in Haunted Places, ebook free via Gutenberg
Review: DNF at 50%. This is actually very readable, and I was probably getting to the good bits just when I stopped, but Hawthorne is a very funny writer, full of charming anecdotes; and I had my funny bone excised at birth. This just didn't work for me.

Title: Hellspark
Author: Janet Kagan
Published: Baen Books, 2019 (1988)
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 350
Total Page Count: 475,415
Text Number: 1678
Read Because: grabbed from this list of five-star books, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: In a multicultural interstellar tableau, a translator is tasked with investigating the potential sapience of a newly-discovered alien race. The speculative cultures and the role of translation, language, and taboo are all too cleanly delineated, all very legible and solvable - this is my perennial critique of SF worldbuilding, and it's both better and worse here: it undermines its own fascination with the nuances of language and culture, but the resulting tone is engaging and lighthearted: a nerdy power fantasy; a slew of puzzles neatly solved. Vibrant and fun, but memorable more for the fact that nonverbal communication is a great avenue for speculative exploration than for the text itself.


Title: To Shape a Dragon's Breath (Nampeshiweisit Book 1)
Author: Moniquill Blackgoose
Published: Del Rey, 2023
Rating: 3 of 5
Page Count: 530
Total Page Count: 482,540
Text Number: 1706
Read Because: reviewed by mrissa, ebook borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: Bond animal meets magical school: an Indigenous girl is chosen by a rare hatchling, and attends the colonizer's school in order to learn the art of dragon stewardship which her people have lost. Somehow this manages to need more magic school and more bond animal: these are ridiculously engaging tropes that here are just ... fine. Some of that works as a critique of education as a form of institutional power, deromanticizing the magical school. But a lot of it just feels like a missed opportunity. The wider world is more fun: a fantasy of resisting colonization which frequently challenges its own escapism, enlivened by clever-if-infodumpy parallel-world worldbuilding. I liked this. It's energetic and readable and very well-intended. I'll probably try at least the next book in the series. But I'm not as crazy about it as I want to be; it lacks a certain spark.


Title: Confessions of a Mask
Author: Yukio Mishima
Translator: Meredith Weatherby
Published: New Directions, 1958 (1949)
Rating: 4 of 5
Page Count: 260
Total Page Count: 484,070
Text Number: 1712
Read Because: personal enjoyment, ebook borrowed from Open Library
Review: An autobiographical novel: the story of a queer man coming of age in wartime Japan. I'm head over heels for the first half of this, which is sexual awakening explored as queer desire meets violence fetish - vividly realized, inseparably entwined, and #relatable amirite. The second half is ... fine, a young adult trying to fit into normal society by making failed attempts at hetero attraction. It follows naturally from the first half, but necessarily lacks some of that tension, the dark, compelling logic and almost claustrophobic interiority, which make the first half so remarkable.

Anyway, time to go read more Mishima. This may not be a perfect book, but thematically it's highly relevant to my interests, as I suspect his other work is as well.

2023 has thusfar been the year of manga. And is it good manga? you may ask; and I answer: literally Gantz set the bar so low that like, yeah, the rest's been great.


Title: Gantz
Author: Hiroya Oku
Published: 2000-2013
Rating: 2.5 of 5
Page Count: 8005 (224+224+226+226+224+224+224+224+232+200+200+224+232+224+200+200+200+204+232+208+208+200+216+216+208+200+232+232+218+192+218+218+218+218+218+216+226)
Total Page Count: 466,195
Text Number: 1598-1634
Read Because: personal enjoyment
Review: After his untimely death, our protagonist is conscripted into a pseudo-posthumous game, a fight for survival against alien lifeforms. The protagonist's early characterization is incredibly irritating, giving this an inauspicious start - but there's some great early arcs: the aliens are weird, the fights are brutal, causalities abound, and the protagonist undergoes significant, complicated character growth.

Pity then that even the good arcs are frequently interrupted by awful arcs (the fireball-shooting dinos stand out) and the second half is just ... bad, ironically losing coherency as the worldbuilding become more substantial. And it's full of fanservice, and the female characters are woefully under-served by the mangaka's misogyny. And the battle scenes are frequently incomprehensible, and the ending drags on and on.

I don't regret the good bits of this, but I sure do regret finishing it. Unfortunately there's no clean division of "sometimes good" and "pure garbage," although the Oni arc is probably a decent end point. Alternately, flee at the first sight of vampires; you'll miss a few good scenes but vastly cut your losses.

( Gantz: 0 )


Title: Kimi wa Petto aka Tramps Like Us
Author: Yayoi Ogawa
Published: 2000-2005
Rating: 4.5 of 5
Page Count: 2620 (184+188+184+178+192+192+192+192+185+188+182+179+192+192)
Total Page Count: 469,515
Text Number: 1638-1651
Read Because: reread
Review: A business woman rescues a young man she finds passed out in a cardboard box, and lets him stay with her on one condition: he becomes her pet. This is one of my favorite-ever manga, and it fills me with an articulate rage composed of equal parts longing and frustration. The premise has permanent residence in my id, and it's a brilliant framework for examining communication and intimacy: restructuring relationships redefines how we engage with them. ...But it seems to forget that the problem that needs to resolved is how and that people communicate - rather than the configurations of the relationships themselves. The fantasy of a high-powered marriage with a pet "on the side" where the latter is the more intimate relationship is so much more engaging than the constant threat that the narrative will resolve its tensions in the most traditionally-structured monogamous relationships possible.

And still, I love it. Some arcs fall flat, but the slice-of-life structure is gently paced and offers space for complex characterization (Momo especially impressed me on this reread); the restrained, bittersweet tone takes a deeply iddy premise and treats it with respect; the art is pretty and consistent (including consistent issues with the lips).


Title: Kimetsu no Yaiba aka Demon Slayer
Author: Koyoharu Gotouge
Translator: John Werry and John Hurt
Published: Viz Media, 2018-2021 (2016-2020)
Rating: 3.5 of 5
Page Count: 4560 (197+192+199+192+197+205+215+199+199+200+192+199+199+199+199+192+192+192+192+192+192+192+232)
Total Page Count: 474,795
Text Number: 1654-1676
Read Because: recommended by Teja, ebooks borrowed from the Multnomah County Library
Review: A demon murders our protagonist's family, leaving only one survivor: his little sister, freshly transformed into a demon herself. This a straightforward "boy finds martial arts community, grows in strength, gains and loses mentors, defeats the big bad" narrative but really quite charming: The art is consistent and bold, the character design delightful. Everyone gets a tragic backstory at pivotal moments. The protagonist is so achingly sincere that it blows through trite and comes out the other side. The pacing isn't perfect, but it's remarkably free of bloat. A solid read!

Not an especial favorite, though. For all the demonic character design and dismemberment and death, it never really feels dark - there's a weird hollowness in tone coming from how vaguely violence is drawn and the fact that our hero and his friends have plot armor while mentor figures are persistently tragic. I enjoyed reading this but, save for a few favorite characters, it doesn't really stick in my mind.