![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
juushikaI have just torn apart (and cleaned) the room in search of my usual pair of glasses, but they seem to have taken their leave—of the room, possibly of the house, because I cannot find them anywhere. I put them down on my laptop keyboard yesterday evening and five minutes later they were just gone. They are hiding. They are on vacation. Luckily I was able to bend a backup pair of glasses into working order. To my glasses I am a force of nature: inexorable, cataclysmic, devastating—if I don't sit on them I drop something on them or scratch them or otherwise render them flawed but, luckily this time, salvageable. The irony is that the vacationing pair is my oldest, very first pair of glasses—I got them in 2001 and they're still in fine working order, and are also (I think) the most flattering pair I own. Both is probably due to their study metal copper-colored frames. The light new bendy floaty look for glasses isn't strong enough to withstand me, and honestly solid frames better suit my face.
I know talk of my glasses is incredibly boring to just about everyone but me, but I cannot get over how suddenly and completely they've vanished. Normally this happens and then a few seconds later I find them on my blanket, or in my box by the bed, or exactly where I put them down so they'd stay safe and I'd be able to find them again (ha!), but this is a full 24 hours of lost glasses. It's surreal.
ETA: Glasses have been found. They were, and this is true, inside my BPAL imp box. Why? Fuck if I know. I didn't use it last night. I have magically teleporting glasses. At least they are found.
In more relevant news, I am almost nearly non-functioning these days. I came back from Ashland abuzz with ideas and motivation, but my brain is still firmly in the grips of depression, completely with the hopelessness, lost energy, absent joy, and brain fog that the condition promises. Writing a goddamned book review takes me two days of fighting and hating my very own self, so that's fun. I'm taking things one day at a time in the sense of the day after: if I try and fail today, I go ahead and give up because tomorrow might be better. I've been watching a lot of movies on Netflix and reading a little, and Devon is (and it surprises me every day) so patient—hopeful—forgiving. I have managed to scrape together half an email, and a book review, and manage some fairly stimulating reading, so it's not all a loss. But it is frustrating, and (at the risk of sounding redundant) depressing. So that's where I am these days.
I hope the rest of you are somewhere better.
I know talk of my glasses is incredibly boring to just about everyone but me, but I cannot get over how suddenly and completely they've vanished. Normally this happens and then a few seconds later I find them on my blanket, or in my box by the bed, or exactly where I put them down so they'd stay safe and I'd be able to find them again (ha!), but this is a full 24 hours of lost glasses. It's surreal.
ETA: Glasses have been found. They were, and this is true, inside my BPAL imp box. Why? Fuck if I know. I didn't use it last night. I have magically teleporting glasses. At least they are found.
In more relevant news, I am almost nearly non-functioning these days. I came back from Ashland abuzz with ideas and motivation, but my brain is still firmly in the grips of depression, completely with the hopelessness, lost energy, absent joy, and brain fog that the condition promises. Writing a goddamned book review takes me two days of fighting and hating my very own self, so that's fun. I'm taking things one day at a time in the sense of the day after: if I try and fail today, I go ahead and give up because tomorrow might be better. I've been watching a lot of movies on Netflix and reading a little, and Devon is (and it surprises me every day) so patient—hopeful—forgiving. I have managed to scrape together half an email, and a book review, and manage some fairly stimulating reading, so it's not all a loss. But it is frustrating, and (at the risk of sounding redundant) depressing. So that's where I am these days.
I hope the rest of you are somewhere better.
